4loveofkink is a organization rooted in education, expression and subcultures of polyamory, fetishes and BDSM. All of which constitute the new expanding kink movement . 4love is a community based website with groups, forums, and links for novice or experts. Containing all amateur erotica, pod casting and webcam shows to spread the LOVE of kink. Founded, produced and funded by Dom/sub kinksters: Trevor Collins and Aaron Jones.
Trevor: “Our mission here its to unleash the passion and power that comes with embracing your own kinks and those of others. Through education, consent and understanding we welcome you to the journey. “
Aaron: “ Accepting your kink is like a second “coming-out”, your scared but ready to try!!”
If you would like to contact us, click on the Connect button above where you will find our contact form and social media links.
By Trevor in Trevor's TrovePodcast’s
If you are even considering Kink please do some research. The easiest place to start is with a podcast. It will give you a little feel for what is to come. It shows that kink is truly for everybody. These are normal-ish people that except everyone no matter what their specific kinks are.
These are “Mega” sites. So much information for newbies and oldies that didn’t know. Tons of people with similar interests. Want a intense crash course on Kink? Regardless of the answer, don’t forget to keep theses saved!
Don't be a Dummy
Thought the title was funny. Extensive glossary and nice getting-started articles. I appreciated the advice giving to budding submissives and warnings signs of a ABUSER. Safety is #1
Munches are local meet-ups within the community. These are very useful for people that don’t believe there are others interested. They are held at !public! restaurants or community centers. There are no crazy outfits, no propositions and no reason to give your real name. Kinks are closer than you think. *Fetlife is also an legit and awesome munch finder*
ALL MIGHTY TUMBLR
If your looking for free raunchy porn without the viruses and invaluable information…. It’s right here!!! Make a free profile and repost all you want . Search internet browser for your kink with tumblr in the title. This was where my BDSM adventure began and it will always be in my back pocket. Super secret, super kinky and many internet blogs also have a tumblr version.
Love this book! Although it is very thick (haha) with lots of statistics, anthropology and neurology. It explains what happens in our head and how our brain is built to process it. Great read! Understand the different ways of thinking between girls and guys. If anything else then cliff notes it and get the gist. It might persuade you to read it!
If you wanna find a date then apps have taken over. Many are by location or question and answer based then a computer matches. Do you wanna be kinky? will most likely not be asked. A lot of online kink matching costs. Apps are dangerous and a long rough time finding a match but at they will be close. I would just put “I’m kinda kinky” somewhere on your profile. Safety is KEY…. I can’t express that enough. Crazy people will use “kink” as an excuse to be sociopaths. Be patient, be smart and have fun.
Safety, Safety !Safety!
So many experiences in such a little space. If your really wanna do research and find almost exactly what you need. Ha. It could take a while but it will definitely be worth it. Whether you wanna come up the kink closet or just curious. Message boards are vital for your expression of kink. Probably worth mentioning that if you think you can bring something new to kink, think again. It’s all been done and perfected for years Sry.
Always a great idea. Make one yourself or keep a journal about your experiences. This will help to keep your mind in order so things don’t get out of hand without knowing it. People can make some top notch blogs about their D/s relationships.
Keep in mind these are usually one couple and kink is whatever you want it to be, with consent. I’ll most likely never care for masks or wearing black leather. Limits/preferences need to be established before and must be honored to build trust. Baby steps my fellow kinksters. No use rushing, just sit back and enjoy the ride.
By Trevor in Trevor's TroveHello my name is Trevor and love the behavioral sciences, more importantly psychology. Biology, anthropology, sociology or anything that can help me make sense of why we think or do the things we do. Where do personalities come from? How do I control my own or make sense of it? Would everyone be better off if we could just understand ourselves. At the top of the list is sex, at least for me. What makes it tick? How does it relate to personalities or quality of life? Is it better to know or not to know? It is truly amazing how much of the brain the human race has not figured out yet. I have many questions without real answer. I know that psy will always be my #1 love but now I want to have sex with it hahaha. I’m a new inspiring Dom and want to express myself using my dark side. I’d like to paint an unusual but familiar picture with the brush stroke my cock.
Whilst in college studying PSY, I had my first seizure and was diagnosed with epilepsy. I imagine from poor eating habits and ridiculous amounts of stress. A year later my daughter was born and I dropped out. I worried about stuff I have very little control over, like the people I want to help but can’t. Caring drives me crazy because just a few words of wisdom could likely keep someone from a lifetime worth of pain.
I’m now single father with a very large tight knit family. I still tend to care a little too much in my daily life and usually put loved ones before myself. I believe that creation is beautiful and destruction is necessary. I think about life as Yin and Yang. At our core we are both equally good and evil, right and wrong but always a silver lining or something to lose. Balance is key! I take care of myself so that I can be there when someone is in need. Otherwise we are both screwed.
Linier Spectrums seems to be the way my mind works . No one is all gay or only straight, all man or girl, Completely dominate or only submissive. We all lie on linier spectrums. Some lie farther than the others but without one you can not have the other. Night/day, love/hate and life/death. I’d advise to play devil’s advocate with everything in life and not to be ignorant from the truth of duality.
"Alone. Yes, that's the key word. The most awful word in the english tongue. Murder doesn't hold a candle to it and hell is only a poor synonym."-Stephen King
It's easy to feel alone in the world, misunderstood, unloved. We all must go through those long nights. We make drastic changes in our lives, often in a desperate fight to not feel lonely. Loneliness has been the curse that caused many bad decisions throughout history. It is also something that can teach and inspire us to better ourselves.
The definition of loneliness is both subjective and objective. How you perceive the world determines how you define it. And our darkest, deepest of emotions, such as loneliness, is no exception.
I would like to share with you a story I heard from Mary Chapin Carpenter's song "John Doe No. 24" I discovered it in the late 90's, and the story behind it starts in 1945 in Jacksonville, Illinois. A black teenager is seen roaming the streets. He is deaf and mute and seemingly all alone. When the police find him, they decide he is mentally ill and lock him away in a mental institution. He will spend the rest of his life in places like this. He once scribbled the name "Lewis". That's the only clue we have as to his name.
The environment of mental institutions at that time was very rough. He developed some abnormal behavior as a result. They gave him many drugs, which eventually caused him to go blind. It wasn't until later in his life that people were assigned to help him. He got close to each of them, but suffered severe depression every time one of those people left him.
"The years kept passing as they passed me around from one state ward to another. Like I was an orphan shoe from the lost and found, always missing the other."- Mary Chapin Carpenter.
As the years went by, things improved in the mental health institutions, and John found more caregivers, and even an assisted living facility where he could live somewhat independently. He was very much loved by everyone who took care of him. Sometimes, they would bring a jazz band to play for the patients. John danced his heart out. He loved the vibrations that he could feel as the band played on. He was warm, funny and compassionate. The prejudices of the 40's and a flawed mental health system shattered many of his hopes and dreams. But he kept his spirit intact.
"What we see, over and over again, is that there's a resiliency of the human spirit that is not going to be destroyed. It's not going to just survive, it's going to win. John is a good example of that."-Sister Bernadette Wynne. Helen Keller National Center for Deaf-Blind Youths and Adults
In 1993, John died. He was to be buried in an unmarked grave. Luckily, Mary Chapin Carpenter not only read the obituary and wrote her song about him, but also purchased a tombstone for him. On this tombstone, is one of the lyrics from her song:
"Life's a mystery, so too is the human heart."
I want my first tattoo to be these words.
After the song came out, it inspired David Bakke to find out more about this man, and he interviewed everyone he could find. His book "God knows his name: The True Story of John Doe No. 24" is among my most prized books.
There's lots we can learn from John. We can be thankful for all the people and love that we have in our lives. We can be thankful that the world is not the same as it was in 1945. We can be thankful for the chances and freedoms that we have that John did not. But his story is not just one to teach us gratitude, it's also one to remind us that no matter how hard things get in life, we can pull through and still be that warm, compassionate person that he was. And despite whatever obstacles we face, we can make our hopes and dreams a reality. Growing within and connecting with others is what life is all about. We should not only do it for ourselves, but for those we might be able to help. We should also do it to honor all who came before us and tried, both the ones who came out the other end better off, and for those that just didn't have the strength.
I think about him often. I tell this story to the people I know as much as I can. But the best way to hear the story, is to listen to the song: